Couple decisions can have diverging consequences for the individual partners, particularly in the middle or long run. When specializing on unpaid care work, and thereby withdrawing from the labour market, women often incur financial risks that may threaten their material security at presence as well as in old age. This asymmetric dynamic may create conflicting interests within a couple beyond their private affair, due to the consequences for the society as a whole (as regards number of children and care responsibilities). The aim of our contribution is threefold. After a theoretical introduction we will first expose the main decision spheres (fertility, work division and use of income) with empirical evidence on conflicting intra-couple interests. Secondly, we will specify those factors that have been identified empirically as determinants of couples’ sharing in the three decision spheres. Our study will thirdly derive political implications: Where does the state govern into couple behaviour by means of tax, family and labour market policy measures?